얼마 전, 싱가폴공항에서 마약을 소지한 죄로 사형을 당한...
네이버에서 번역된 편지를 읽고, 인터넷에서 검색해서 그의 편지를 구했다.
네이버뉴스(연합뉴스제공)는 http://news.naver.com/news/read.php?mo ··· id%3D104를 가면 볼 수 있다.
영어는 안되지만, 원문으로 올린다.
세상 어떤 사람도 그를 비난할 수 없다. 우리는 다같은 죄인일 뿐이다. 마약을 운반하는 죄는 거짓말을 하는 죄보다 더 나쁘다는 것은 인간의 생각이고 잣대이다. 하나님에게는 똑같은 죄인일 뿐이다.
...
그가 하나님을 사모하고 있는 것이 그의 편지에 보인다.
나는 그가 천국에 있다고 확신한다.
이 편지가 그 증거이다.
Nguyen's correspondence
from www.theage.com.au
Ready for angels
Hello. Are you OK? Sailo loves you very much you know. Please tell me how you are feeling. Sailo needs and wants to understand so that I can console you. Please be honest with me. You will only hurt me more if you keep it to yourself. Sailo will promise to do the same. I'll even volunteer to go first. Sailo is relieved. Sad for Mum, Kijoa, my family and all my loved ones. I am worried and concerned about Mum and you. As for me, it wasn't no surprise.
I've known for a long time now. Sailo was just awaiting my day of judgement and I am glad and ready to go now. I believe, by then, God's purpose for me will have been achieved. Sailo shall continue to pray, exercise, write and be who I was the day before I found out, only a little more humble. Fear has yet to set in and pray may God's strength in me be enough to ward off any doubts I may have. I truly believe God put me here for a reason and now that his plans for me has almost been achieved, He is preparing me for his little baby angels to play with when I return to him. Sailo's faith has only strengthened since Friday. Please be there for our friends and Mum especially. Do that and know all my worries shall be relieved somewhat. And I want you to be around people who love you. How did you take the news? It'd be wishful thinking to believe you were as composed as Sailo...! I just went through my routines and slept between 7pm and 7am. So 12 solid hours did me a world of good. God blessed me with so many beautiful beings who have loved me unconditionally. Did I make front page? I am hoping not. But if I'm gonna make news, I might as well be on the front page, heh! Shouldn't be a laughing matter.
How are you feeling? And you have been more than fair with me. You have been - Always - there for me when I needed you most and when you weren't, you prayed for me. God has blessed me and God has blessed you too. I will write to you again real soon.
Always forever your Sailo
----------------------
Dear Mr President
In a place ravaged by fear and hunts I have found hope. I have discovered purpose. I have begun to learn the true meaning of life.
Recognising and understanding my offence as a result of callousness has been crucial, essentially the turning point for my remorseful transformation; an opportunity of self-discovering made only possible upon my conception of God and Jesus Christ into my life.
Amidst these painful revelations an unspoken truth was exposed. I found myself in deep sorrow for the true victims; the families of those whom suffer as a result of losing a loved one to drugs. Truth has put many things into perspective.
Although I am still learning to live my life without regrets, I have found some solace in accepting all my fallibilities as an integral part of my mortality, an attitude accredited to a life without God.
I accept responsibility for my actions.
Many transitions have taken place since December 2002, a culmination of which has changed me on a fundamental level. My discovery and conception of God into my life was, and is, the foundation for these changes.
The on-going process of these changes are: I am learning to love selflessly, to give and share all that is mine; I try to be more understanding and patient in everything I do and encounter; to be more considerate and accepting towards those around me; to be more compassionate, generous and gracious when helping those in need, especially on the minutest of tasks; to do something in place of nothing; I try to be less selfish, less self-centred and less self-righteous; to be less judgemental and more perceptive.
However, and more importantly, this whole experience, and the efforts made to spare me, has humbled me, enabling me to source a sense of comfort in giving back to anyone and everyone around me who are in need.
Amidst all that has been achieved, I thank God for all that was made possible, through him, and through me.
I have learnt to love my neighbour.
---------------
After the sentence
The surrealism surrounding the verdict had me mute. I only remember turning to God for fortitude, to hear me as I walked. Out of the docks, down steps, a smile - of shock - takes hold as I walk the corridor, I prayed God listened.
I'm numb. Anxiously pace, impatient to journey on back and forth I walk and pray, for Mum, Khoa and loved ones. Focusing on them, I forget my own anguish, the officer stands guard. To protect me, from myself? Perhaps. Or maybe to console. We talk.
The conversation is lost on me now, but I'm sure his presence aided somehow.
I wonder how long till we leave. He says soon. So we wait. He is in silence, I am in vigil. Taken from my comfort zone, I am shackled again, ready to embark into the future. Now, in auto pilot, I go through the motions. Finally I'm processed, now officially condemned. My new home away from home. Empty holding cells go by in a blur. Voices. Familiar laughter. Then it dawns on me, I know all these guys, lived side by side among them. Unfortunately they arrived before me. Like a reunion we all get reacquainted, exchanging condolences and somehow we are content in the comfort of each other's existence... my mortality.
I long for something I cannot yet define. A need greater than any I've ever known. I am still learning to deal with tragedy and adversity; but to receive so much kindness, where do I begin?
Nevertheless all this support has been instrumental in keeping my fighting spirit alive.
My predicament. A view to die for? Hmm... at the least, many have been into perspective for me.
Taking stock of the life I have lived only makes room for disappointment. So many things I should have done and should not have. Now I have this chance. An opportunity to make a difference, to avail.
Life is what you make of it. No matter what tribulations you face, looking on the bright side makes an inexplicable difference. The grass is greener on the other side...
The pain of missing her is by far sharper than anything physical I have ever felt. With aching comprehension I come to terms with the loss I feel without Mum.
Posted by 돈마니
